Sunday afternoon

We are home from the hospital!  Taylor was released yesterday and we got home around noon.  I was so happy to be able to give Mercedes a big hug.  Last night Mercedes went with my mom and brother to my Grandma's in Eden for the weekend.  It has been good because the first few days after returning home from the hospital seem to be the most difficult and since they've gone, I am able to focus my full attention on Taylor.  It has been a bit difficult, but things seem to be getting a little better today.  Last night Taylor was in so much pain, and so nauseous he was hardly able to eat or drink, and at one point he threw up, making his whole body hurt worse.  The night was a bit rough, and this morning his open wound on his abdomen was looking a little worrisome so we called our amazing home care nurse.  She came and looked at it and talked with Taylor's doctor.  They concluded that things looked okay for the time being and we just need to keep an eye on things.  This afternoon Taylor's pain has lessened a lot and he has been able to eat a good amount of solid food for the first time in 6 days.  I hope things can keep going smoothly!

 I was cleaning the kitchen today while Taylor was resting and I began to have a lot on my mind.  We have some immediate family members who are going through some very difficult physical trials and while I sat loading the dish washer I couldn't hold back tears thinking about them.  I went down to Taylor to talk to him about it and tell him how my heart just feels broken for them.  It made me ponder on the feelings I had, and why I was feeling them so strongly.  I thought about all that Taylor, Mercedes and I have been going through and how extremely difficult it has felt at times.  One thing that I have learned for certain through our trials is that they have changed us.  We have felt so broken physically and emotionally at times that all we had was to hold onto our faith in Christ.  There have been many moments where I have fallen to my knees and cried out saying "Please, help me through this!  I need strength because I feel like I'm breaking."  And I am always strengthened.  Heavenly Father hears my prayers and He tells me that I am not alone.

 Our trials have helped me to see.  I love others more deeply than I did before.  I feel more deeply than I did before.  Tears come easier!  Which seems to be good and not so good...

I understand a little better the purpose of life.  And that we are not all here to live our lives in our own private bubbles but to share them with others.  We're supposed to love and support others through our trials, and to share our joys and sorrows.  We have certainly received our share of love and support and honestly I can't imagine how much harder things would be without it all.

We go through hard things because they are meant to soften our hearts, and hopefully make us a little more Christlike.  I am grateful for hard things, because it makes life much sweeter.

Day 2 (Post surgery)

Another day has passed here at St. Mark's and we are settling in for the night.  Taylor is now on a clear liquid diet but he hasn't felt like eating much, mostly because his options consist of broth, Jello and juice.  We're hoping they'll move him to full liquids tomorrow so he can have some more choices.

As for me, well...

 Have you ever tried Subway's chocolate chocolate cookies?  There is a Subway on the ground floor, just four levels below us.  I've indulged a bit these past few days.

 I meant to take a picture of the delectable cookies but I ate them before I remembered to.  So this is all you get.  Sorry.

 Here is my ever-patient husband.  We look forward to getting past the next few days because introducing food to his body again is not going to feel very good for the first little bit.

 Tonight we are enjoying some Olympic Free Skating.  You know, being in a hospital is not the first place I would pick to have a get-away with Taylor, but the one-on-one time together is very nice.

Here's our nifty little info board.  Taylor and I were talking earlier about the goal.  We have no clue what is written or who even wrote it.  I think it says "Remove Foliy CI liq."  I have no idea.

 

 Then we got to Skype with our little girl.  She has been so silly.  At one point she told me, "I have to go pee pee!  Leave the ipad on and I will be back, okay?"

 She ran errands all day with my mom today.  They met up with my dad at the MTC and had lunch with one of my parents' old missionary couples who served in their mission.  My mom said they sat for two hours in the cafeteria and Mercedes was so patient.  My mom said, "She played with my phone, talked to missionaries, and then when the missionaries cleared out I told her to go run across the cafeteria.  So she ran all around.  Then after about two hours she whispered into my ear 'Grandma, it's time to go home.'"

She has been fantastic for my parents while we've been gone and we are so grateful.  We hope to be able to go home in the next couple of days.

Mercedes

You were born February 19th, 2010.

Four years ago today you made me a mom.  I was in love immediately.

 Even when you were only weeks old, people noticed your sweet spirit.  Strangers stopped me in public constantly to look at you.

You have a wise soul.

And you are very kind.

 Did you know that you teach me every day?

 You are so strong, and you are such an example to me.  You make me want to be a better person.

 You are so curious, and especially about things that relate to the human body.  Every day you ask me how different things work.  

 You have an amazing desire to learn, and when choosing a TV show you often ask to watch "How It's Made."

 You love your Heavenly Father, and your earthly father.  In fact, you pray for your daddy in every prayer, every day.  And have done so for months.

 Sometimes I feel like you're the sister I never had.  You're my little buddy, and I love having you with me always.

You say that when you grow up you want to be a doctor, a candy maker, and a mom, among others.

 You would love to have siblings, and in the mean time, talk about when you will have your own babies, and your plans to share a bunk bed with them.

 You are all girl.  I often find you with makeup placed creatively on your face.  Apparently lip gloss is not just for the lips.

 Have I mentioned your humor?  You are spewing with it.

 You are creative, very active and very energetic.  You love to twirl and dance to music.

 You are also a very hard worker.  You love to see my reaction after you clean your room all by yourself.  I AM so proud.

 You are extremely nurturing.

 And you have SPUNK.  Your determined spirit will take you far.  And so will your super fast running legs.

You are my best girl.  I will never be able to express how much I love you.  Daddy and I are so happy that you are ours forever.

Thank you for being my daughter.

Wednesday, February 19th

Did you know that Taylor and I haven't seen Mercedes since she was three?

That's right.

Today at 6:46 a.m. she turned 4 years old.  It pulls at my heart strings being here in the hospital away from her on her birthday, but thankfully we celebrated her birthday a little over a week ago.  We threw her a big party while Taylor's family was here and it was a very fun day.  We Skyped Mercedes this morning and sang "Happy Birthday" to her.  My wonderful mom is taking her to do some extra fun things today and they will have cake and ice cream tonight.

On our Skype call with Mercedes

I think I will dedicate another post to Mercedes later today.

 Taylor is feeling so good today.  He does have pain of course, but I think our walk around the halls this morning was the most he's walked even since before the first surgery.

 For now he is only allowed to sip water and chew on ice chips as we are still waiting for his bowels to "wake up."

 Once that happens, the new plumbing will take some getting used to...so the doctors and nurses say.  We'll see how that goes!

 We are so happy.

(PDA)

Good Tuesday

Taylor had his second surgery today.

It went well!  They did the "Ileostomy Takedown" and Taylor is so happy.  He no longer has an ostomy bag and now he just has to get used to the new reconstructed "plumbing" as he recovers from this surgery.

I'm so glad we are at this point.  SO grateful.  I was so nervous about the first surgery, and we got past that point.  I was nervous about the period between surgeries, and we've passed that point.  I was anxious for the second surgery, and we have now completed that.  Now... Taylor just has to recover from this and as long as there are no complications, he can begin to exercise and get strong and fit and healthier than he has been in many years.

I feel like posting a bunch of recent photos:

Mercedes and I visited the Payson Temple on Sunday 

Mercedes had a sleepover with Taylor and I in our family room two nights ago

My superman

My favorite bathroom wall heater

Yesterday Mercedes and I went on a date to the Orem mall

We love our dates!

Mercedes sitting with me in the bathroom early this morning while I got ready to leave for the hospital

Happy Taylor, just after we arrived at the hospital this morning.

We are so grateful for the nurses and hospital staff here at St. Mark's.  They have been amazing.  And we are especially thankful for Taylor's surgeon, Dr. Row.  He has changed our lives.

Taylor

Taylor's second surgery is scheduled for this coming Tuesday.  Four days away.  That was even sooner than I was hoping for and we are oh so excited.  After that, if there are no complications he will recover and get back to life at last.

We were so happy to have the first surgery done but the past six weeks since have been very difficult, for Taylor especially.  I was the most nervous about this period between the two surgeries and I am so glad it is now almost over.

I cannot wait to see Taylor thrive again.  It's been a very hard few years for him.

He is amazing.

And I love him so much I could burst.

Angels

Remember how our car broke down four weeks ago?  Well Taylor's mom, dad and brother drove all the way from northern California last weekend just so that my father-in-law and brother-in-law could work on our car until they could get it running again.  They worked on it for four days and just when they were down to the wire on time, they fixed our car and it was up and running!  Taylor and I couldn't express the gratitude we felt, and still feel.  They worked so hard and were determined to get it running, no matter what it took.  They are amazing.

Today Taylor, Mercedes and I were headed north to Salt Lake City for Taylor's scan, the scan that will tell the doctor whether or not Taylor is ready for the second surgery.  So in other words, it was a very important appointment!  We stopped in Orem first to drop Mercedes off with our sister-in-law BJ.  On the way, however, I noticed the steering in the car was getting very stiff and by the time we got off of the freeway I knew something was very wrong.  By the time we pulled into a parking lot right next to our destination, the car couldn't be driven another block.  We popped the trunk and it turned out that we lost the belt to the alternator and power steering pump.  We were relieved since it seemed like a simple fix but that didn't help our immediate situation.  We HAD to get to Taylor's appointment and the clock was ticking.  We took Mercedes up to the apartment to BJ and Taylor's brother Jonathan loaned us his car so that we could continue to SLC.  So even though our car was suddenly inoperable we hardly missed a beat and were able to make it to Taylor's appointment on time.  Just like four weeks ago, our car broke down in the PERFECT place.

 I know that we are being looked after.

After we brought the car back to Jonathan and BJ's and picked up Mercedes, my mom (who was already planning to head to Provo/Orem) picked us up and we got a ride back home to Payson.  This evening Jonathan fixed our car and he and BJ brought our car back to us tonight.  I can't thank them enough.  They watched Mercedes while we went to Salt Lake, let us borrow their car, they fixed our car, and then brought it back to us.  Oh, and while they were here this evening after bringing our car back, they pulled out a laptop that they didn't need any more and gave it to us, complete with case and a yellow bow. I am now using this laptop to write this blog post.

Family members from both sides of our family have been our angels, and we could not do any of this without all of them.  And like I said before, we know that Heavenly Father is blessing us.

Tomorrow we head back to St. Mark's Hospital in SLC to meet with Taylor's doctor and talk about the scan.  If everything looks good, they'll hopefully schedule the second surgery and we can begin yet another long awaited chapter.

Mercedes and BJ making cupcakes!